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Defining the Five Core Pieces of Your Relationship's Foundation

Defining the Five Core Pieces of Your Relationship's Foundation

What's been your favorite memory together in the last 12 months?

Yup! August is almost done! Can you believe it? That means fall starts next month...Woah...

To wrap things up for August, we will be looking at how to use your relationship's foundation to look ahead and help you in the future!


It's all come down to this! It's the final week looking at your foundation as a couple. We've talked about how things in your past have helped you create a strong foundation throughout the month, but today, we look toward the future.

At first, we talked about that first date and all the feelings you had when you were first dating. Then we talked about your strengths as a couple and the things that made you a good fit.

This week, we want you to put that all together to create your foundation. But first, a little trivia question: what is the strongest shape?

When it comes to engineering and architecture, the triangle is the strongest shape. Look at the Pyramids. They've been standing for thousands and thousands of years. The triangle shape is so strong because of its base, which supports it. Its "foundation," you can say.

So, we've got a little activity for you that helps demonstrate how YOUR foundation as a couple can help your relationship stay strong for thousands of years too!


On a piece of paper, draw a giant triangle. Then separate the triangle into five horizontal sections (similar to the nutrition pyramid).

The bottom section is the biggest and holds all of the weight. This is the most essential part of your foundation. When things get rocky or start to shake, it will be this section that keeps your relationship standing strong. In that section, write down the most important thing in your relationship that holds you together. It doesn't matter if you are in an argument, stressed, tired, or just having a bad day. This one thing will help you get closer together when you need it most.

The thing you place in the base of your triangle is usually something that transcends your relationship and speaks more to the core of who you each are. It can be something like your faith. It could be your desire to create a strong marriage based on your family history. It could be that you both are best friends and would do anything for each other. Basically, no matter how tough things get, you can each look at that one item and agree how important it is to you both.

Fill in the rest of the triangle with things that you consider to be a foundational aspect of your relationship. These things may be less concrete than your base, but are still important. They could be things like your shared interests, a goal or aspiration you both share, or common personality traits that bring you closer. Together, these five things can help you keep your relationship strong no matter what you may face!


Once you are done, take a look at your triangle. The things you put inside might be things that were important to you before you got together. They could be things you've developed over time. They have all been strengthened throughout the entirety of your relationship, and chances are, you've used them before when your relationship needed them.

Think of a few instances where you used each one of these things in the past. Describe the situation and why focusing on that thing helped.

Now, look to the future. Together, talk about how you can use these things better or more effectively to keep your relationship growing. Now that you've identified that foundation, how can you make it even stronger!?


Daily High/Low


Before bed every night this week, tell your partner your high for the day and your low for the day. What was the best and worst part of your day?

When you get to the low, turn it into an opportunity to grow. How can you use that "low" to become a stronger person? How can you avoid it in the future? If you are listening to your partner, how can you help support your partner if they ever have this "low" again? Use it as a way to get stronger and as a way to be a better support for your partner.

Finally, talk about this biggest obstacle in your relationship for that day. What one thing is working against you (it doesn't need to be anything catastrophic, just one thing that may be hindering you). Looking at your triangle, how can you use your foundation pieces to help you overcome this one thing?

Date Night Ideas

Be honest...who is the better singer?

It's time for the final round of date ideas for August! Next month, we will begin a whole new topic, but for now, let's finish strong with some foundation-inspired date night ideas!

But first, answer us this: which of you is the best singer? Like, when that one song comes on, they start belting it out (you know the one)!

Second question: do you have your own relationship playlist?

There is nothing quite like building a playlist for your relationship. But the one we have planned for you today is just a little different than anything you've made before.

Premium member? Click below to see this week's set of date night challenges!